A Look at Labern (poem)

I.

You are the last. Already, the weight
Is piled on: deuce years of sustained
Effort, ignoring brilliant sunshine and the reigned
Pleasures before you. It's optional, yet you wait

To live your life. 'Must' and 'have to' are
Your favourite words. So absorbed, the student
Focuses on the day, the reason for being prudent.
If you don't succeed, you presume you're not on par

With humanity! Base an opinion on me.
Perhaps I am the anti-Christ, the evil one
Who quit when his mind proclaimed "You're done";
Ironic? I hate that pressure, but also, being free,

To rue every mistake, my grandiose thoughts
Perhaps more ugly than my features...
It's in the eye of the beholder, a myriad of creatures:
So my guilty self should head straight to the courts

II.

For my punishment. Cast charisma aside
And enigma too: I'll tell you now,
I don't weep for attention: when we row
I may try to save my battered pride...

But I want to let go, I'm just missing a heart;
We all know humans are selfish, dark and light,
Melancholy strikes me, where others would fight --
Once saddened, I give up, when you depart.

So nature or nurture, which one's to blame
For my persona, a very strange being?
What inverts me so quick, that you're seeing
Someone, who's not at all like why you came?

Am I Labern today, and Luke L. the next?
A continuity error, fragile and complex --
At once a poor example for my sex...
Is that what you think, when reading this text?

III.

All males, are they concentrated and cast
Like mass-produced figurines, to hurt and destroy?
I think not: for every bastard, a female will toy
With a poor boy's affections, until at last

The union is smashed. Who picks up the pieces?
This I know not. Though when it's my turn
To suffer heartbreak, this fire will burn
Through my every cell, until truly, peace is

Impossible. Such restlessness within, too much
For this crooked psyche to bear...
I'm sure many believe it's impossible for me to care:
You're wrong. I would, if I could, fix all with my touch.

Love, not war, should be universally sought:
See, death, hurt, hate and melancholy
Will stalk us like shadows, such is man's folly:
To actively love, to accept... Many have fought,

IV.

But you could give in: life and love perish,
Death follows us always; when will it strike?
Why not give someone special a call? You will not like
That feeling, when what's gone is what you forgot to cherish.

Only a brief dip should we take, in this black
Pool: we need not dwell on doom, for we will
Submit, eventually... Let's try to enjoy this, at least until
That final day comes; we'll never get these days back.

That's not to say it's not worth thinking about:
Murder, to extinguish another, is to destroy yourself...
"Fuck the world," some say, as they end life for wealth.
Tragedy has struck. What can one do but endlessly shout

For justice, punishment, for correction. Such sorrow,
How do you take? Is ignorance blissful...
Or do such atrocities ... Do they, indeed, pull
You towards The End, where you would gladly borrow

V.

A gun, and blow out your brains? Then, here's rescue
In the shape of your friend. To assist and mend
You is their selfless goal. You realise you depend
On them, and that they, in time, will need you.

That inner smile, it's what makes rainbows appear.
To rise from the bottom is a joy like no other --
They help you up --sometimes unconsciously-- when you smother
Yourself, in isolation. To finish off fear:

To defeat what defeated you: Impossible alone...
When reality pounces: It's exam day, that's right:
Procrastination had you enveloped. When you thought you might
Escape, here's the teacher on the phone:

I've missed my tests, and shame will sink
My self-confidence, -esteem and my -image... has gone too.
Where will I go now, what could I possibly do?
I guess... I'll meet my friends, and have a smoke and a drink.

* * *

5 Parts, each one on a different theme: College, Depression, Love, Death and Friendship.